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On Pleasant Behavior And Being A Patient in the Hospital

Dr. Wes has a short post today, How to Optimize Your Care While Hos­pi­talized that got me thinking. He writes:

…A lone doctor lis­tening to some highly expe­ri­enced and capable nurses, reflecting on their work:

“If the patient’s nice, it’s a lot easier to want to go back in that room with them. Their rep­u­tation travels at the nurses station. But if they’re mean, well, it’s not as easy to go back in there, so I might not stop by as often.”

“I agree, it’s easier to catch flies with honey than vinegar.”

Words to live by.

My first take: He and the nurses are right, of course: If you’re pleasant and cour­teous, nurses (and doctors, and physical ther­a­pists, and aides, and cleaning staff…) are more likely to spend time in your hos­pital room. The maxim applies in many realms.

But let’s take the con­ver­sation to the next level. What if the patient’s in pain? Sad, or maybe even crying? In that case, are the hos­pital staff less likely to enter? Probably so, but health care workers are a diverse bunch.

There are many nurses I’ve known who’d spend more time with an unhappy soul, or someone in pain. As a doctor, I think the same holds.

Maybe some people are grouchy because they’re uncom­fortable, worried or lonely and just don’t have it in them to smile. They may lack insight or simply lack manners. They might be very upset, say, that a son or daughter hasn’t visited, or another unmen­tioned disappointment.

Perhaps it’s the professional’s job to see beyond the smile, or the anger.

Not an easy job  -

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6 comments to On Pleasant Behavior And Being A Patient in the Hospital

  • Oh, you are so right, Elaine. Why should anyone feel happy, polite, cheery and chipper after they’ve just had surgery, a heart attack, a CVA or some other calamity that is bad enough to send them to the hos­pital? Most people do their best, truly, but I think we all need as clin­i­cians to remind our­selves that our patient’s affect might be a symptom of some­thing we need to pay attention to. I’ll never forget a patient I had in sub­acute rehab early in my career who became sud­denly con­fused, teary, moody, unco­op­er­ative, and labile. At first, we thought she was having another CVA. She wasn’t. She was suf­fering from hypona­tremia. Who knew? We were trying to control her salt intake because of her pre­vious CVA and hyper­tension, and we con­trolled it a little too well! It was a lesson I never forgot.

  • When nurses and other hos­pital per­sonnel are well trained — meaning they under­stand that the patient’s behavior is often a man­i­fes­tation of their physical state — then whether or not a patient is “nice” is irrel­evant. I find those kind of labels fairly narrow conceptually.

    I just spent two days at MD Anderson as a care­taker. Perhaps that colors my thoughts because our care was superb. Hos­pital staff barely have the time to go have lunch; much less talk about who’s nice and who isn’t. On our unit were patients with severe head and neck cancer; many involving recon­struction. The staff was devoted to making sure each was com­fortable and had what he/​she needed.

    People ARE com­pli­cated; and looking at them as “sunny” or “opti­mistic” pigeon­holes them at a time in their life that may be their most chal­lenging. Under­standing goes a long way.

    Jody

  • Ryanna

    I’m a nurse at a hos­pital. I com­pletely under­stand what this article is saying. I am in a patient’s room more if they are hurting, crying, scared, upset.

    I have a very hard time going into a patient’s room who thinks I am their per­sonal servant to fetch lattes for them, or one who yells “get out” when I am trying to make sure that they are stable, or who thinks that all hos­pital employees are somehow “out to get them”.

    Do I not go into the room or ignore call lights? No. No nurse I know would ever ignore a patient. But I will not be stopping in for extras like drinks/​snacks/​pillows UNLESS they put on a call light.

  • Jody, Thanks for your insights on this. Unfor­tu­nately, a lot of hos­pitals (read: nearly all) aren’t so well-​​staffed as is MDACC. A stressed nurse or doctor assigned to too many patients may have a harder time coping with a grouchy person who’s ill.

    Ryanna, It sounds like you’re clear about your pri­or­ities! You’ve inspired me to write more on some of my expe­ri­ences with nurses (from my patient’s per­spective). Best wishes -

  • Rachel Heikes

    I think this article holds truth to it, BUT on another note as nurses (or other health care pro­fes­sionals) we do put the whole picture into con­sid­er­ation. We know there are factors/​underlying issues that can cause the behavior. On that note, some patients are just plain rude, just because that is just the way they are. I myself, will politely call patients on their behavior, rudeness, demands. A majority of the time when I call them on it, the way they treat me changes.

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